Thursday, September 17, 2009

keep me near the cross.

*if you're following me on twitter you might have an idea of where this is coming from*

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now i'm not the praying type. or even religious, but i'm going to need some heavenly assistance if my days are going to continue like this.

i started working in a nursing home today for a class that i'm taking. i don't really care to work with the elderly because they just remind me of how i will be wrinkly and funny looking in about 50 years and i really don't like to think about such things. but the class sounded interesting and i'd at least get some volunteer hours that would look good on a social work grad school application.

this is a pretty upscale retirement facility and about 95% of the residents there are white. slightly more than half of the staff that work there are not white. i know they are from another time but shit but well...

today i attended the singalong with about 20 residents. at first it was benign shit like, "i bet you're quite the singer"

*side eye*

but then once they get into the songbook, not one but two songs included the word darkie.





that was fun. me being the only such darkie in the room. in 2000 fucking 9.

i was there with another volunteer who was hispanic. some old lady kept coughing up a storm. i initially offered her a glass of water and she declined. still coughing the hispanic girl offered her some which she declined as well. she then promptly got up to get her own. o rly?
when she got up to leave somebody took her seat and songbook so when she came back the only place left to sit was beside me. i offered to share my songbook which of course she declined. but was quick to take one from my supervisor.


sidenote: that's being black in america for that ass. having to just swallow random insults like that and still smile so you don't scare old white ladies.

once again, a good portion of the employees are not white. how the hell does she get by?

an employee who looked about old enough to be living there randomly came up to me and was asking me general background questions and started to tell me how she came into the field of working with the elderly. and she said that yes it's depressing working with the elderly because they're going to die, but it's all worth it if they can be happy in their last years on earth.

what. ever.


Beautifully.Conjured.Up said...


...wait, let me check my calendar...ok, yes it's 2009...

...yes, that reminds me of the time I was at work and heard the term "Tarbaby." These white ladies were talking, that word came up, and they didn't know I was right behind the cubicle. The girl who shared the cubicle with me was also white, and judging by my expression on my face, she just looked at me and said, "I'm so sorry." I told her don't didn't matter.

Even though it did, I just made myself feel better by offering them coffee the next day, and I did the Celie from the Color Purple and spit in it.

pb™ said...

rofl...maybe next time you can put a little shug avery pee in their classes and see how they like that

pb™ said...


lord i need sleep

Gem said...

DARKIES?! *faint*

Dude...what thee fucketh?

Tarbaby too huh? WWWOOOOWWW. I live in Texas, but in Houston nobody can really get away with overt racism, so I nor anyone I know has experienced this. I would almost prefer that than the covert racism because at least you know who the enemy is.

How long do you have to volunteer here?

*~Miss M~* said...

lol I know what class this is for and double lol cause you could totally tell this story in Development of the Black Child. sometimes when stuff like this happens to me I just sit and wonder if I'm just imagining it all, but I'm probably not.