#1 [and most importantly] NO YOU CAN'T TOUCH MY HAIR.
*seriously, why does everyone (regardless of the extent of their relationship with me) want to touch my hair? one of my friends (white guy) got upset with me for not letting him touch it. he wanted to because he had never seen hair like mine apparently. i kinda got pissed at him because he said something to the effect of black women won't let people touch their hair but they can touch his. i kindly informed him that that had nothing to do with me since i'm not a proxy for all black women and i'm not all that interested in touching his hair.
i didn't like people touching my hair when it was straight. i don't let my mom touch my hair. if i let you touch my hair: you probably snuck it in without me noticing and i don't want to be a complete bitch, we are good friends, or you have a very good chance of having sex with me*
#2 i am not a lesbian.
#3 i don't write poetry, neo-soul is not my favorite genre of music, and i don't burn incense (i prefer blogs, hip-hop and alternative music, and bourgie ass candles)
#4 [to black people] please stop trying to grade my hair.
apparently my hair has been deemed just barely good by the negro hair council. not nappy per se but not mixed girl curly/straight. it's a c- on the grading scale of goodness. it's just barely acceptable but it needs some tutoring (straightening) for a good grade.
please stop. it's hair.
#5 i'm not a vegetarian/vegan/environmentalist
#6 [to black women]i don't care what you do to your hair. i don't care to convert you to the side of nappyness
#7 while it is sweet, calling me sister/queen/whatever gets annoying. brittney/pb is just fine.
#8 i guess it's nice that you're curious and whatever, but if i hear 'how did you get your hair like that?' one more time... it just what it does!
did i forget anything?
*on the plus side, my mom said my hair was 'kinda cute' the other day which is a big step up from her grimacing and saying 'i have to get used to it'*